


You break everything you touch

by theflyingdalek



Category: James Bond (Movies), Skyfall (2012) - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Finally a Bond POV, M/M, Sadness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-22
Updated: 2012-11-22
Packaged: 2017-11-19 06:25:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/570193
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theflyingdalek/pseuds/theflyingdalek
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"You break everything you touch."</p><p>Those five words have been following James Bond around for his entire life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You break everything you touch

"You break everything you touch."

Those five words have been following James Bond around for his entire life.

Even when he was a young child, and his parents were still alive, James Bond was never really considered a normal human being. He wasn't clumsy in any manner, no matter what some people thought. His mother once mentioned that he moved with purpose, and things around him just got in his way. And what got in his way...broke. Especially the few things he cared about.

His parents went first.

It was a mountain climbing accident, and nothing that young Bond should even consider blaming himself for, but Bond learns things easily. And on the day of the funeral, when he knocks over a vase and his Aunt Charmain sighs "You break everything you touch, James", James realizes that he is the reason why his parents are dead. He breaks everything he touches.

When he is twenty-one, he is recruited into M16, where he was expected to break things.

For the first time in his life, he felt like he was useful. 

He quickly learned to cover his insecurities and hate with alcohol and clever words. He built a facade of confidence that virtually nobody could see though.

Vesper saw through it. And she went next.

Vesper who didn't fall for his charms right off the bat, and who was in love with someone that controlled her every move. 

M was right to say that Vesper knew that she was going to her death. And in the end, the only thing that mattered is that she died because of him.

And of course M was one to see right through him as well. She was the only person that Bond knew that actually knew who he was, his strengths, his weaknesses, the whole lot. She never expected more than he could give. She never expected less. She knew who he was, better than he did. Bond was supposed to watch after her. His one job was to protect her. But in the end, he failed again and he let someone break her. 

The moment she falls to the ground, and James grabs onto her thinking, not again, no not this again, not with _her_. But it is too late, he breaks everything he touches. 

Of course apart from the important ones, there were always the countless women and men that he slept around with. Secretaries. Housewives. Engineers. Spies. One after another, they fell. Sometimes in gruesome ways, sometimes they were lucky and just shot or poisoned. But they always fell.

Bond wants to shut off any connection with anyone for forever. It is safer for everyone that way

But M knew James Bond. She knew that he would very likely seal himself off from any other connection for the rest of his life. So she left him that damned dog. 

When Moneypenny handed Bond the box, Bond was more than a little surprised. He knew that he was M's favorite, but to expect something from her seemed... off. M wasn't the sentimental type. When he saw what it was though, he understood immediately. 

That ridiculous dog survived a bomb with destroyed the entire headquarters of MI6. It was something even Bond couldn't destroy. That was what M was telling him, he just needed to find someone so outrageous and stubborn that even James Bond couldn't break him.

Bond destroyed the dog as soon as he could. M would have expected him to. It was a message more than a memento , and M was never very sentimental anyway.

So Bond moved on.

And now there is Q, this young, ridiculous, clever, little Quartermaster who had a quick and biting wit, and a smile so bright that Bond has actually taken extra care to attempt to bring back his equipment intact on as many missions as possible (he fails quite a bit though), just to see that smile.

They have been sharing kisses and beds for two months when the words fall out of Q's mouth like boulders falling onto the ground of their already precariously perched relationship.

Bond limps into Q Branch with every single piece of multi-million pound equipment damaged beyond repair. He knows that Q is going to flip out about the things. Not to mention, Bond knows that he looks like hell.

Q looks at the double-oh agent's very injured figure and looks like he is having a rather fierce internal debate. They had decided to keep their..relationship a secret for safety purposes. So after a moment or two of silent staring, Q walks closer to Bond and takes the damaged weaponry from his hands.

Q clucks softly, and whispers "You break everything you touch, don't you?"

And there it is. The ever present fear that Bond has been so delicately keeping behind a paper thin wall of defense breaks through.

Q looks up when Bond almost imperceptibly tenses. He frowns and his eyebrows furrow, but he says nothing. He just sweeps the damage into the rubbish bin and sends Bond off to medical to be stitched up.

Later that night, when Bond pulls away from Q's embrace just a bit faster than usual, Q seems to sense that something is wrong.

"It was what I said about breaking things, isn't it?", he whispers.

Bond doesn't reply, but Q is used to that by now and carries on.

"It is irritating when you don't return my things, but I'd much rather _you_ come back intact sometime."

Bond turns around, so that his back is facing Q, and Q's voice trails off.

Q doesn't say anything for a long time, and Bond is beginning to think that he has fallen asleep when Q says quite clearly.

"You're not going to break me, you know. I won't let you."

Bond wants to say that Q is acting like a petulant child, but he knows better.

Bond doesn't turn around, and he doesn't reply. But he smiles and when Q curls up around him, Bond doesn't push him away.


End file.
